P A G E  323
I'm feeling a little weary after this weekend. It's been my busiest weekend for a long while. I enjoyed it nevertheless! Anyway, it's Monday, so let's crack on!
After having a cat practically sit on my head whilst I was doing stomach crunches (yes, really) it's time for me to go out with one of my friends for a walk with her and her dog.
A refreshing Autumnal walk to start my day. I've never been to Tredegar House before, which is unbelievable considering it's about a 10 minute drive from my house. I shall be coming back again for another walk, mainly to take some more Insta-worthy photos. The mind of a blogger, eh?
I might need your opinion on this everyone, when is it too early to listen to Christmas songs?
Yes, I have Mariah Carey's Christmas classic playing in my house this afternoon, if my Mam was home, she'd tell me to switch it off, shouting "It's too bloody early!". Plus I can have a good singing session in my living room!
I need to pop out and get a couple of things from Home Bargains. Wet wipes and car mats. As you do.
That's a sign of a mature adult. I don't know whether that is a good thing or a bad thing.

P A G E  324
An early start for me at the gym this morning. It's 8:00am and I'm already sitting on the recumbent bike giving my lungs and legs a workout. Just half hour before I was lying in bed, thinking of all the things I have to do today. I'm the only gym bunny on the second floor. Except for the cleaner, who's wearing a hoover pack and looks weirdly like a Ghost Buster. Let's keep pedalling.
It's midday and I've been in the bath, washed, dried and straightened my hair, taken blogging photo's and made a mini to do list for the next week. Some would call that a productive morning.
I left the house an hour ago to do all my errands and I've managed to get what I needed to do done.

Yes, this was one of my errands - picking up a parcel from New Look. Yes, it was my favourite errand to do. The rust coloured trousers are my favourite I think, probably because they were £10 in a sale. Also they're elasticated, I've got to an age where I like elasticated trousers. You'd think I was 85 not 25!
My cat doesn't like my singing voice. You'd think he was Simon Cowell the way he is looking at me.

P A G E  325
My emails are pinging like crazy on my phone this morning -

Black Friday is on the horizon and all the online stores I have an account with are sending me countless emails with their deals and offers for the upcoming Friday. The day where everyone is going to go bat shit crazy and find the best deals and push people out of the way to grab a new TV. People aren't surely resorting to violence to get a Sony TV surely?!
After being stuck in traffic for 45 minutes coming home from work, I need to do a workout to let all my stresses out. Normally that would be Pilates, but I want to try something a little different -
I think my abs are going to be killing me in the morning. But in a way, I don't mind too much, it shows I've done a good workout! I may not think that tomorrow morning though!
I've only just realised there we're ten days away from the 1st December! There is one thing I am looking forward to, it may sound weird to some mind -
Yeah, I know, weird. It's just the mind of a blogger.

P A G E  326
I've woken up with zero energy this morning. I could easily stay home and stay on the settee all day. But needs must, it's time to go to work and earn some money.

I've come home from work feeling worse than I did this morning. I suppose that's right, working with kids does take it out of you. Right, let's get some sleep, well, after I'm a Celebrity.

P A G E  327
Even though it's Friday, I'm kind of feeling disappointed that I won't be doing this -
Believe it or not, I kind of like the hustle and bustle of the shopping rush. Well, not where people start pushing and shoving each other to get the good TV's on sale, but just seeing everyone trying to get a bargain and frantically trying to find the jumper or dress they want in their size. You always hear a lot of swearing around on Black Friday!
Oh yeah, Charlie (my cat) has a new friend -
Yes this is Brian, A good house guest, doesn't speak much and just sits there quietly. He cost £20 in Home Bargains and he is massive!
Right, work has been and gone, I'm home and after a long week, it's time -
I need a glass or two to unwind tonight, cheers!

P A G E  328
There's only one thing I am looking forward to on this Saturday -

Oh I have missed this football. International football is too boring. Right, I've got to get motivated to get up out of bed. One thing I struggle with in the colder months is getting out of bed in the morning. These are days I want to be a hibernator. Sleep all day. Now that would be bliss.
I've come back from the chemist to get my prescription and then New Look to pick up a parcel and I've already fallen in love -
I cannot wait to wear these. I've got about 14 outfit ideas with these puppies. Right, let's go and do a bit of food shopping then come home and wash my hair.
Now, it's time for Liverpool.
*Update - a 3-0 win. Get in!
Absolutely buzzing right now!

P A G E  329
Sundays are meant to be a day for relaxing and chilling right?
I am feeling slightly undermotivated to do anything today. Well that was until I just looked at my car and realised how blogging it looked. Because I drive through the lanes to work during the end of the week, it gets dirty incredibly easily. Right, I better give it a clean.
I've just driven to Halfords to get something for my car. It was tyre pressure caps as one of mine seemed to be missing from my front tyre. Strange but true. Anyway, I've just come back to my car and I spot something rather disgusting but also highly annoying -
Thanks birdie. Time for another wash on my one side of my car when I get home now.


Story of 2018: Chapter Eleven (Pages 323 - 329)

P A G E  323 I'm feeling a little weary after this weekend. It's been my busiest weekend for a long while. I enjoyed it nevertheless! Anyway, i…

Blog Reads Of November

Here are my favourite blog posts from November: 1) Why I'm Scared of Instagram  | Hannah Mary I read this post thinking "Hallelujah! Someone …

Two Years of Blogging

I've only just remembered that I've been blogging for two whole years now! I can still remember the day when I published my Wix site, feeling incredibl…

Story of 2018: Chapter Eleven (Pages 316 - 322)

P A G E  316 It sounds like a herd of elephants are trampling all over my roof this morning. My neighbour is having his roof done and you can imagine ho…

Bullying makes you do a lot of soul-searching, but not for the right reasons. Bullying makes you popular, but not for the right reasons.

Being bullied made me feel like I was an outsider for so long in school. I wanted to act like everyone else, but I knew that I couldn’t and the worst thing is - I was made to think there was something wrong with me. I was made to feel that the person I was brought up to be was uncharacteristic and just plain weird. I wasn’t one for smoking behind the trees in school (even if I was healthy I wouldn’t touch a cigarette) or walking around with a huge group of my classmates who I barely talk to for no apparent reason than to talk shit about others. I had more respect for the people who I was going to sit next to in lessons, even if I didn’t talk to them. At the end of the day, it’s about morals and values.

There’s always those expressions and clichΓ©s society use to tell you how to tackle bullying and what you should do if you are in that demoralising situation, whether it be at school or even a workplace.

“Tell the headteacher, they’ll sort it out for you” - no they bloody won’t!
“Our school has a zero tolerance to bullying” - yeah, alright then!

Now, I can’t talk about bullying in the workplace because I haven’t had much experience in it (thankfully) I can only draw from my (bad) bullying experience in school.

Society stresses to the victims of bullying that it makes you stronger. Does it though?

It depends on the person. I mean, I can only speak for myself with what I think about how bullying has affected me.

Bullying made me a shadow of my former primary school self. My confidence took a nose dive in comprehensive school and my self-esteem hasn't truly recovered. Which is unfortunately quite sad.

I still get flashbacks from my comprehensive school days. They play back through my mind like an old video tape whenever I take a selfie, ones which are particularly close up in the facial department. I think back to all the shocking and belittling things my so called 'friends' used to say to me about my appearance, my looks and just about me in general. All the vile, humiliating remarks they said to me not just online on MSN, but to my face too and also behind my back. Even though I always found out, well gossip in school can spread around like wild fire. That's where the low self-esteem really takes hold of my mind. Also a strong sense of paranoia.

I suffer with terrible paranoia. I’m always wondering why people look at me randomly in the street if I’m walking past them or what people think of my latest selfie which I’ve posted in social media. If people look at me and laugh, I’m wondering if they’re laughing at me maliciously. I know, that sounds quite bad. It’s not that I’m self centred, it’s the result of being ridiculed in school for many years.

Will I ever 'cure' my paranoia? Only time will tell, I hope I can shut out those feelings and finally be able to feel more confident and less anxious about what others think.

Let's try and end this on a positive note! I don't want to make it sound like I didn't have one single friend in school. I had friends but one in particular was my only best friend in comp and we've known each other since we started nursery together. 22 years later, she's still my best friend and I wouldn't have got through school without her. She was my rock during that horrid time.

Halfway through the post, I asked myself the question if being bullied makes you stronger. I definitely think it can in some way. It can make you incredibly strong minded and more empathetic towards others. With me, I'm very protective and will defend my friends and family till kingdom come. I don't want them to go through what I went through and also feel the same way as I did in school. I can't bear the thought of that happening.

But if you are being bullied, please don't feel your worthless or unworthy, because you are NOT. You are the better person they those bullies will ever be. You will go on to do bigger and better things than they will, then you can rub it in their faces when you've got a high paying job and their sat on  their arses at home watching Jeremy Kyle.


The Effects of Bullying

Bullying makes you do a lot of soul-searching, but not for the right reasons. Bullying makes you popular, but not for the right reasons. Being bullied made…

Story of 2018: Chapter Eleven (Pages 309 - 315)

P A G E  309 It's a start of a new week, I'm making the most of these next two days as I'm back in work on Wednesday. My lord the thought doe…

Asking for brand collabs - yay or nay?

Brands emails landing in my inbox are like gold dust. Yes, it doesn’t happen very often. But when it does, it does honestly feel like Christmas has come early …

Making the most of our time

 Now, think of a spirit level with productivity at one end and procrastination at the other end of the spirit level. It's had to find the right balan…

Story of 2018: Chapter Ten/Eleven (Pages 302 - 308)

P A G E  302 I love getting up on a Monday knowing there's no work. This makes Lucy happy. So, I am up and around quite early for someone who isn'…

Feeling Cosy with NA-KD

It's that time of year now where it's safe to say that we will be requiring our jumpers, cardigans and, well, anything that can keep us warm. There…