It's not very often I can say that I have had a fabulous February. Usually my birthday month of May is the best one (obvs!) but even my birthday month is going to have to be pretty damn special to beat February 2019.

I've seen a boost in my confidence which I lost a while ago. I'm feeling happier and more content with myself, I feel like I can conquer the world again, like I wrote in this post a little while back.

I just want to focus on all the things that make me feel positive and distance myself away from all the negative things.

I'm a strong believer in positive mindsets, I want to keep in that mindset for the rest of 2019. Hopefully it can stay that way.

So yes, what have I been up to this month that has made me think that it's been frigging amazing?!

I visited my happy place at the start of the month, this trip stood out for me in particular. I overcame some bad anxiety beforehand and made the trip up even though I wasn't feeling my best. As I walked along The Strand and Pier Head, I found myself beaming from ear to ear. The witnessing the picturesque skyline made my anxiety disappear within a flash.
From meeting friends over some banging food to shopping in town to completely slogging around in my hotel room eating prawn cocktail crisps and drinking rose, I'd say I had a pretty good weekend!

Ok, I know what you're all thinking - "Why the hell would a hospital appointment make it into your favourite moments in February?!" Well I'll tell ya, because it went so bloody well, that's why! Lung function was good, weight was good, the small cyst on my liver hasn't grown any bigger and I've miraculously grown a centimetre in height, how could I not be happy?

In between these two highlights, I had some bad news about my job, which I won't go into now as I want this post to be a happy one!

I went to my second blogging/networking event in Cardiff with House 21 again. I so much enjoyed the last event that I was eager to come to the next one. From drinking tea and eating avocado on toast (how very bloggery!) to listening to some inspirational ladies give talks on how they have become so successful and are working towards their aspirations, it really inspired for the following week ahead. Meeting like-minded people really gives me the confidence to strive for what I really want in life. Hmm, I wonder when the next event is?

Less than 24 hours after being in Cardiff, I was back in the capital city again going to BBC Wales to do a spot of filming for BBC Sesh. The video should be online within the next week or so. No, I am not going to tell you what I talked about! One thing I can say is that I hope I can help people who struggle with this certain problem. One of the highlights has got to be filming in the room where the Doctor Who props are kept. Yes, I couldn't resist having my photo taken with a Dalek and the Tardis. Literally had to fight the temptation to shout "EXTERMINATE" when I stood next to it.

So to the other months which lie ahead of me in 2019, you better step up and prove February wrong.

Let me know your favourite moments from February!


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I've just come back from a(nother) trip to Liverpool and as much as I thoroughly enjoyed meeting friends, strolling around and blowing my wages (oops), I travelled up for a little personal reason of my own - to gain my confidence back.

Near the end of last year, I kind of lost that little bit of 'oomph' , for want of a better word. I feel like my anxiety is creeping back into my life after I firmly slammed the door in it's face in 2016. I made a little pinky promise to myself that for 2019 all that was going to change.

I want to do a mini throwback to the 2nd February, pre Liverpool eve, I encountered something which I haven't had in a very long time - an anxiety episode. The morning started with me getting some news which would affect my plans in Liverpool, so that threw me in a spin, then trying to pack ready for the next day and also getting an upsetting email really wound me up into a state of upset, with some tears and panicky breathing thrown in for good measure. I literally found myself saying - "I don't want to go to Liverpool tomorrow". Also - "I can't do it, what if something bad happens?!" This WAS NOT like me in the slightest. Liverpool is my happy place, why the hell would I not want to go?! Anxiety is a powerful thing, sadly.  

Even before going to bed that night, I still didn't feel confident enough in going. But it's hella amazing how much a good nights sleep can change your frame of mind. The next morning, I felt eager to get my suitcase packed and I couldn't wait to book a taxi to the train station. 

Like I said at the beginning, I needed to go away to get that much needed confidence back that I have kind of lost over the last year or so.

I'm so happy that I fought back against my anxiety and braved the cold weather of the Royal Albert Dock and slogged out in my Premier Inn hotel room.

I never really talk about anxiety, I suffer from it terribly and because CF is the main focus in my life health-wise, anxiety comes a distant second to that. However, after two glasses of Echo Falls rose, I found myself pouring my heart out on my Instagram Stories talking about the day before where I was feeling so frantic and panicky. I'm not saying the alcohol influenced me to do that, but you know,  It felt very cathartic and therapeutic for me to do that, even though I haven't got thousands and upon thousands of Instagram followers.

Oh yes, I did have a lovely two days in Liverpool thank you! A much needed catch up with friends and a lengthy walk around my happy place really has made me feel fabulous and I feel I can conquer the world once again!

I look like I've given myself an emo haircut here


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