Getting Your Hopes Up In Life, Is It Wrong? - My Thoughts

Oh, I am the Queen of getting her hopes up. Hand me my crown and be done with it. Many a time, I have got my hopes up for all different reasons. Health reasons, job reasons, relationship reasons and even getting my hopes up about male potential suitors. I think getting your hopes up in life is common for anyone who has a positive mindset. Even though I am a realist, I still like to think positively in my life. 

A woman sat on the floor

Getting your hopes up in life could mean that you have no control over your emotions. 


I can definitely see why. I'm someone who can let their emotions get the better of her. Regardless of anger, upset or excitement, I'm a woman that wears my heart on my sleeve. So getting my hopes up in life has meant a tiny bit of heartache for me. 


We're all told when we're kids to believe. To strive for our dreams and goals. No one teaches you how far you can fall if it goes tits up. Also, nobody teaches you how to overcome that fall and move on.


Over time, I've found myself limiting my hopes and expectations to avoid getting hurt. That feeling of hurt when I've got my hopes up is heartbreaking. It makes me feel like a failure and then that has a knock-on effect on my self-confidence. However, I plan to change the way I go about this. 

A woman sat on the floor.


If getting your hopes up means getting hurt, why not think of it this way - rather than hurting over it, embrace it? Embrace not getting what I wanted. Maybe look at it that it wasn't meant to be and that there's something better for me ahead.


For example, perhaps you've got your hopes of dating a special someone/crush (something I've gone through myself) and it hasn't happened. Now that is a heartbreaking situation to find yourself in, I know full well. Look at it this way, maybe he/she wasn't meant for you. Maybe he/she wasn't right or worthy of your love. This may sound like a Cinderella-style fairytale to you all, but it's true.


Getting your hopes up is, for me personally, a good and bad thing. 


You may be setting yourself up for a fall, but when you really want something, you'll do anything to get it. And when you do achieve that goal, that feeling of exhilaration and satisfaction you'll feel will be worth it. 

A woman sat on the floor.


The worst kind of thing to happen is someone misleading you to get your hopes up. It's cruel and very callous of that person to mislead you to believe that something good will happen to you when they know it won't. If that has happened to you, I hope you have learned to read and recognise the signs of when someone is doing that. Many people have misled me into this in the past and it's awful. I hope it never happens to you guys!

So, getting your hopes up - is it ok to do that? My answer is yes. 


I know I've said that I have limited getting my hopes up over things to avoid disappointment. But that feeling of knowing it's actually going to happen is just wonderful and the confidence it gives you is unreal. It's kind of like manifestation - if you believe it will happen, it will - as long as you have that strong belief. 


Are you someone who is hopeful? I'd love to know your thoughts!
25 comments
  1. Love this post, Lucy. I have a lot of mixed feelings about getting our hopes up. I'm a pretty positive person by nature but I've found myself in the past going through periods where I won't allow myself to get my hopes up because I've been so disappointed in the past, so I just don't expect anything, to save getting disappointed and upset.

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    1. Thank you Jenny!
      I'm totally with you there lovely, I've not allowed myself to get my hopes up in fear of disappointment if it doesn't happen. Like you said, it's better not to expect anything, that way there's no disappointment or upset x

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  2. This was a really thought-provoking blog post. I think having hope is a positive thing. As long as it doesn’t become debilitating. Thank you for sharing.

    Lauren. - bournemouthgirl.com

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    1. I agree Lauren, it's good to have hope, but it's important that it doesn't become debilitating x

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  3. I loved reading your thoughts on this! It’s such a great way to look at things. Thanks for sharing! - Her Digital Coffee

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    1. I'm glad you liked reading my thoughts on this topic!

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  4. I def tend to get my hopes up! But I like how you see it in a positive light. 😊🫢🏻 - Mind Beauty Simplicity

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    1. It's always good to look at hope in a positive light!

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  5. It seems like you and I are very similar people, Lucy! I fully agree with you, both negatives and positives to this.

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  6. I can relate to this from when I was trying to get pregnant. False hope month after month was so difficult! x

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    1. False hope is the worst and I can't imagine how hard it must have been when you were trying to get pregnant x

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  7. Oooh such an interesting post! I'm naturally a positive person and get my hopes up over a lot of things. It's not very often I don't. I do agree however that there's good and bad sides to it. X

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    1. I like how positive you are Claire, it's good that you like to get your hopes up over things x

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  8. I think it's very important to be optimistic - as you say, if things don't work out, there will be something better that comes along very soon! x

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    1. Absolutely Lisa, something better will come along if something doesn't work out! x

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  9. I agree - it's a good thing. It shows how optimistic and glass half full you are! I think we are very similar!
    Rosie

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  10. I tend to not get my hopes up that often because there is the chance of whatever it is not working out, but I do think it is good to have hopes and dreams. That is also a good point of embracing hopes not working out instead of hurting over it.

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    1. I find it's always better to embrace something not working out as you know something better is coming!

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  11. I always try not to get my hopes up as I hate being disappointed, but deep down I can't really help myself, my mind always goes there!

    Corinne x
    https://skinnedcartree.com

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    1. I'm the same Corinne, I can't help but get my hopes up and then end up feeling disappointed! x

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  12. I am an optimist, and I always hope for life. However, I agree that sometimes the greater hope, the greater the disappointment.

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    1. Absolutely, the greater the hope, the greater the disappointment

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  13. This is a really interesting, insightful post. It made me think of lockdown- all too often I would get excited about being able to see my boyfriend, and all too often the rules would change and we would be back in lockdown! Thank you for sharing your thoughts here, it can be a good and bad thing for sure x

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