Lifestyle & Fashion Blogger

26 May 2021

Is It Ok To Be A Realist?

I am somebody who does like to dip their toe in the pool of optimism. Some things in life require optimism, hope and imagination. However, I am somewhat of a realist. I like to stay realistic about my expectations and situations that crop up in my life.


There is a common misconception that being a realist means you're disguising yourself as a pessimist. I don't that's relatively true, I think being a realist means you are good at managing your expectations but hold on to that hope that it will happen. 

Is It Ok To Be A Realist?

I'll give you an example. I want to move to Liverpool. It's been my dream ever since the first time I visited there in 2016. I would love to pack up my things and bugger off up there, however - it's just not realistic. I need to acquire a good paying job and be able to afford a flat or house, which I don't have and can't do right now. It doesn't mean that I should shove my dream in the bin, it's just managing my expectations and evaluating what I can and can't do. At the end of the day, I don't want to go up there with no job or home to live in do I?! The dream is still in the pipeline, but I think all my ducks need to be in a row in order for me to achieve it. I'm hoping for the best outcome, but I've also considered my other options. That, for me, is a realist's head talking - and I like being that way. 


Of course I don't want anything to go wrong, I'm just realistic about what I can and can't accomplish. Reading that back, it may look and sound to so many others that I'm being negative, we all perceive things differently. But I kind of want you to get the idea of what and how a realist thinks.

Is It Ok To Be A Realist?

Being a realist is ok, I'm happy to sit in that camp! People all sit in one of three camps - optimist, realist or pessimist. Are you a glass half full or half empty? We all fall in one of those camps, but only you know which camp you sit in. 


Realism and being a realist allows me to look at situations from all angles - what could go right, what could go wrong and what will most probably happen. I'm all for preparing for the worst, as somebody who has gone through so many obstacles in terms of health, love and relationships, I feel I need to mentally be prepared for all outcomes. I like having plans A, B, C through to Z. 

Is It Ok To Be A Realist?

One thing I have certainly learnt about being a realist is that I may not be easily likeable. People who know me well enough will know I am a very honest person, sometimes my brain is two seconds behind my mouth but I do like to speak my mind. I never intend to upset anyone with what I have to say, I just don't like seeing the ones I like and love getting hurt or stamped all over. If I think there is an issue, for example, with a friends relationship, obviously I don't go in head on and say what I think, I wait for them to tell me the issue and then if they give me permission to give advice, I'll give it. Anybody who hurts my family or friends will have to run like Forrest Gump. Like seriously, I'm on Kaftrio now, I can run like Usain Bolt if I have to!


Ok, back to being a realist. Is it a bad personality trait to have? I don't think so. Like I said before I like to manage my expectations and sit on the fence I suppose. I'm all for optimism as well, if there is a reason to be optimistic, I'll sit in that camp when I need to, being an optimist is fun and it's good for the soul. However, I will base myself more in the realist camp as that's where my head is and I've kind of trained my mind to be that way. 

Is It Ok To Be A Realist?

This post is aimed in getting across to people that being a realist is ok, it doesn't mean you're a Mr/Mrs/They negative pants, it's about dealing with expectations and being realistic about anything you can and want to achieve. 


What are your thoughts on realists/realism? Let me know!

46 comments:

  1. Love this post! I definitely think I go through periods of all three but I'd say I'm probably mostly a realist too. I think I can often get into unhealthy levels of realism though that push into pessimism by not allowing myself to be optimistic so I think it's very important to find a balance that works for you!

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    1. I totally agree lovely, it's important to find that balance with realism and pessimism!

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  2. The world needs more realists as we're handy for finding problems that can then be problem solved ahead of time

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  3. Hi Lucy.

    I think that you've pretty much summed it up with "What could go right, what could go wrong and what will most probably happen?" We all think that question but different people have different views about which aspect should be focused on.

    I'm primarily an optimist (but with a good measure of realist thrown in too!). My wife says that I always assume that things will work out how I want them to. That's not entirely true - I just try to do things that generate the outcome that I want! As they say in the forces "Hope for the best, but plan for the worst."

    Keep being a realist, Lucy. Realists I can cope with - it's the pessimists that can be draining! ;)

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    1. Absolutely Richie, we as individuals focus on one of those three aspects and that we all have different views! It's kind of like manifesting for what you want and what you want to achieve isn't it?
      Oh I agree, pessimists are draining!

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  4. Primarily I'm an optimist, however I still very much am a realist, especially when it comes to money, or life goals etc. I think it's good to have a balance of both.

    Claire.X
    www.clairemac.co.uk

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    1. I think it's definitely right to be a realist in terms of finances etc. You can't be an optimist when it comes to money! x

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  5. I'm exactly like you! People always see it as a negative to not be 100% positive all the time but I think it's just being sensible. I totally agree that people can think it's cold or glum too. But no one wants to feel crushed for no reason when you could have prepared for another outcome?!

    Sophie
    www.glowsteady.co.uk

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    1. Absolutely Sophie, being a realist doesn't mean you're a negative person, it's just about being sensible and being realistic of expectations. You're right, no one should or want to be disappointed when things go wrong x

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  6. Love love love this! I think it's much better to be a realist, maybe some may not like it but sometimes having someone who is too optomistic can be bad too. I've experienced a lot of toxic positivity in the past which is why I try to think more realistically now. xx

    Caroline | https://envirolineblog.com/

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    1. Some may not like a realist's attitudes Caroline, but I think it's good to have that balance of optimism and realism! Toxic positivity seriously needs to be binned! x

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  7. MY fiance is such a realist but it actually really works with my own natural optimist personality. He keeps my feet on the ground and keeps me from flying off to another planet
    Rosie

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    1. That's great that you have that balance of realism and optimism between you and your fiancé! x

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  8. I'm a huge dreamer and sometimes I think it's a problem but I'm a realist when I need to be and it is so important to think smartly sometimes xx

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    1. There's definitely nothing wrong with being a dreamer, we all have dreams we want to fulfil and achieve! xx

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  9. Oh, I totally relate to this. I'm 100% a realist, no bullshit, if I want something, I work to get it and not sit in la la land haha. I'm in no way a pessimist because I've worked really hard to achieve everything I have in my life now and have never shot down a dream/goal without legitimately trying it first. I could go on about this because I find in my life there's two types of people 1) people who speak more than do 2) shut down goals immediately before trying. Great post as always, Lucy xx

    Lynn | https://www.lynnmumbingmejia.com

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    1. I love your attitude and sass Lynn! I love your outlook and how you want to live, it's inspiring and it's something I have a lot of respect for! xx

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  10. I really enjoyed reading this post, much needed!! Thanks so much for sharing and gorgeous photos x

    http://adventuresinmay.blogspot.com

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    1. I'm glad you enjoyed this post and thank you for reading! x

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  11. yes for me it is completely ok be realist and look at thing objective and not "dream" so much. I like your photos, they are so beautiful.

    www.exclusivebeautydiary.com

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  12. This is such a great post. My boyfriend is very much a realist and whilst sometimes he says something that will upset someone, he does it with the best intentions.

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    1. I think sometimes people don't know how to handle a person with a realist attitude, so they take something as being blunt and rude when all we're doing is being honest!

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  13. I'm a realist and I always have been! I can also see this from another stand point as I moved away from home with the intention of not returning x

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    1. It's nice to talk to a fellow realist Kayleigh! x

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  14. I try my best to be optimistic and positive, but sometimes it's just not possible! I tend to live in a dream world of my own when I don't want to be caught up in stuff I don't want to be affected by, but mostly a realist too. I know, there are a lot of shoes to wear around here for a one person show! x

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    1. I've been like that too Simona, it's hard to not get caught up in a dream world and not wanting to get tangled up in stuff that you don't want to effect you! x

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  15. I enjoyed reading this blog post so much sweetie!

    Danielle | thereluctantblogger.co.uk

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  16. This is such a great post. I think I am a mixture of both an optimist and a realist. And I think it is good to have that balance as well!

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    1. I agree lovely, it's so good to have that balance!

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  17. This post I can relate to highly! I love dreaming and I can be very optimistic when it comes to ideas, but my actions are always done within my means. I think it's okay to be realistic and it's not a negative thing at all. It's sensible and smart. Em x

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    1. It's good to be optimistic but like you said, it's important to do ideas within their means! x

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  18. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, I used to be an idealist dreaming of how my life would pan out, none of it has happened in the way I thought that it would in 10 years later, I do hope that things will change for me :)

    Nic | Nic's Adventures & Bakes

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    1. I'm sure everything will pan out like it's supposed to!

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  19. I like to be optimistic, but to be honest, I'm the kind of person that can really tell what is going to happen in reality!

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  20. I loved reading this Lucy! I've always thought of myself as a realist and I'm definitely someone who, like you, will tell it as it is haha. I'd describe myself as an ambitious realist :) x

    https://www.femaleoriginal.com

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    1. Thank you Faye! I like that you describe yourself as an ambitious realist, I'm going to start calling myself that too! x

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  21. I'm a total realist too, it gets on my husbands nerves sometimes but I do think it's a good thing. I just think it's better to be more realistic about things in life eek! xx

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    1. I totally agree Alice! It's so much better to be more realistic with all the things that happen in life! xx

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  22. Nice blog with great post, Thanks for sharing!

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  23. I AM SOO REALISTIC !! sometimes it gets on my boyfriends nerves LOL
    SHY - https://www.shyyshianne.com/

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    1. Haha! It's good to be realistic at times!

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