Lifestyle & Fashion Blogger

29 September 2020

I Hate Being Called...

...cute. 


It's something I get called quite often and I'm just not a fan of it. Cute is something you call a puppy, a kitten, something pink and fluffy or a baby, not a grown woman. I think the reason I hate (I know hate is a strong word) it so much is that I've been called it so many times on Instagram posts and in life that it's started to get on my nerves. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the compliment and the sentiment behind it, it's so kind of people to call me something nice, but it's just not my fave word anymore!


I don't know why, I find being called cute more of an insult than a compliment these days. I understand why people call me cute, I have the facial features of a 12-year-old, I'm small at only 5ft 3 and I have chipmunk cheeks that would make Chip and Dale proud. Maybe that makes up to being called cute? Who knows. In the beginning, I didn't mind being called cute as it was quite sweet that people saw me in that way. Now I'm 27, I just don't find it a compliment so much. 


I will admit that I have used the word cute in the past - but only when somebody acts in a way that is seen as cute. For example, a CF friend of mine messaged me the other day and told me she had sent her doctors a card to say thank you for taking care of her over the years. That's something I would call cute, but mainly, kind. 


Anyway, me being called cute - I don't find it cool anymore. I don't think people will stop calling me that as I think it's maybe a word that they associate with me, so I will appreciate the sentiment to which it is meant rather than moan too much about it. I shouldn't make people feel bad calling me what they perceive of me. I don't want to scare people who want to compliment me and think they're going to get their head bitten off. I am nice, I swear. 


There are a few reasons why I hate being called cute - and they are:



1)  I  FIND  IT  PATRONISING
___________
I'm sorry, do I look like a puppy? I feel like I should be patted on the head and fed a treat when I get called cute. Don't get me wrong, I know you're not trying to be rude or belittle me, but it is, for me personally, an act of infantilism being called cute. I have a car, I can drink endless amounts of vodka and cranberry juices (not literally, but you know) and I can vote. I'm not a child or a baby hippo.



2) I  FEEL  LIKE  IT'S  A  PHYSICAL  ASSESSMENT  OF  MY  PERSONALITY  /  BODY
___________
For me personally, being called cute means I fall into the bracket of not being exactly beautiful but not being exactly ugly either. In a way though, being called cute means I'm kind of being underestimated which is something I like, I love being underestimated, it's such a form of empowerment for me. So that's one positive of being called cute!



3) IT  REMINDS  ME  THAT  I'M  SHORT
___________
Yep, I don't need reminding of that. Thanks. Now please stop towering over me and let's get a (socially distanced) coffee.



4) IT  FEELS  LIKE  I'M  NOT  BEING  TAKEN  SERIOUSLY
___________
Yeah, to me it's kind of demeaning being called cute. I'm a 27-year-old woman. I'm an independent woman. I don't want to be called cute when I want to get my car tyres changed or when I laugh at a bird shitting on someone's coat. Let's be fair though, that is hilarious. 



5) I'D  LIKE  TO  BE  CALLED  OTHER  THINGS  TOO
____________
Strong, brave, funny, kind, caring, supportive, even weird - honestly, I wouldn't be offended in the slightest if you decided to call me weird!



6) I  FEEL  LIKE  IT'S  A  STIGMA
__________
Is this all I'll be known as now? I really hope not! Like I said above, please call me something else. Except hun. Hun is on my hit list of words I'd like to banish from the Oxford English dictionary. Along with bae. 



Ok, this post does some a little whiny and negative. I know that's not the vibes I usually like to bring to this blog, but it's something that's been on my mind for a while. 



I don't want people to be shit scared of saying I'm cute, call me it if that's how you see me, I can't and won't ever stop you from doing that! But I kind of just wanted to say how I feel about the word in general. 


I gotta feeling this post isn't going to go down too well...


Let me know your thoughts!

48 comments:

  1. I hate the word, 'hun' too 😀

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  2. This was such a great post. And it's actually made me think quite a lot about the word "cute" and how I use it. As a 28 year old woman, I don't think in most circumstances I'd want to be called cute either. Unless I'm trying to be cute, for a photo of something, if that makes sense?

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    1. I get you mean Jenny, when you're trying to be cute on purpose, that's different, but most of the time I'm not trying to act cute, I'm just acting like me! x

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  3. Thank you for sharing!
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  4. Oh wow! I would have never thought that being called cute could offend... but i guess that everyone is different and take it in a different way. Thanks for sharing it!
    xx

    Eli | Curly Style

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    1. Obviously it wouldn't offend some people, but it does for me nowadays!

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  5. this was very interesting for reading but now I understand why you don't like when someone call you cute.

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  6. I hope I am not the only one reading this thinking 'Oh god have I ever called Lucy cute???' I really hope I haven't because I think your an awesome BADASS!!

    Great post though, I don't think it is part of my vocabulary but I will make sure if I use it, it is only to my 9 and 6 year old daughters from now on!

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  7. Thanks for sharing, I have lots of words that I have been called over the years, the one I find confusing is "Duck" as I thought that I was been called a bird! (My mum dislikes it too!)

    Nic | Nic's Adventures & Bakes

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    1. I think 'duck' that stems from the north doesn't it? That's one word I've never been called!

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  8. This was interesting because I get called cute for a lot of the same reasons. I'm only 5ft and have a young face, people never guess my age right. But I don't really mind it too much. I think the word can be patronising depending on the context it's used but I wouldn't mind if someone told me I looked cute in my outfit, for example. I can see why you don't like it though, they're all valid reasons! And I feel the same way as you about hun, absolutely awful x

    Sophie
    www.glowsteady.co.uk

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    1. It's the same with me lovely, people have never guessed my age right! You're right lovely, it can come across as patronising if it's used in the wrong context. Hun is one of my most despised words, it's so annoying! x

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  9. Oh my god! As soon as I saw you had wrote 'I hate being called...' as your blog post title I was thinking well if that was me I'd say cute and you literally wrote that. I'm the exact same as you! I could so relate to everything you said! I hate being called cute. I'm only 4"11 and my whole life everyone has been like 'aww you're so cute Lauren' and I'm like nooo I don't want to be cute even more so as I've got older. I'm a grown woman!! Not a child. I find it so patronising. I don't mind if it's about something I've done for someone else, like I've gone out of my way for them and they're like 'oh that's so kind and cute.' because I always call my boyfriend cute when he's done something nice for me but when it's like about your appearance or something I'm like no!! 😂 so glad you wrote this xx

    Lauren | itslaurenvictoria.co.uk

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    1. I'm so happy to hear that you could relate to everything I said Lauren! You just summed up my life there with that sentence, I get the "Aww you're so cute Lucy" all the time and it's not fun to hear anymore.
      Yes, if I've done a cute act, then that's different, but I don't want it to reflect how I look in general appearance (if that makes sense!)
      I'm glad I'm not the only person who feels this way Lauren! xx

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  10. I'm right there with you Lucy! Not necessarily sure that I'd say that I hate being called cute but I'm definitely over it now haha. I've got a real 'baby face' so 'cute' has always been the go to compliment for me. Don't get me wrong it's nice to be complimented but I'd like to think that at 23 I'm more than just cute haha

    https://www.femaleoriginal.com

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    1. Yeah I know what you mean, I think I'd rather be called something else too! x

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  11. I've never minded being called cute but then I've never thought how it could upset other people too. I always mean it as a compliment and take it as one, but I can totally see where you're coming from, especially from a patronising standpoint. And I love the idea for swapping it out for something else. This is definitely an insightful post!

    Anika | chaptersofmay.com

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    1. Yeah I used to take it as a compliment, but now I'm 27 years old, it doesn't feel like a compliment so much these days!

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  12. What an interesting perspective. I definitely want to respect those who prefer not to be called certain terms, but I guess I've never considered "cute" derogatory (unless it's from a stranger or an old man on the street or something). Good to know that some might find this offensive so I can be considerate in the future!

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    1. I think it's all about people's perspectives, I know I'm definitely in the small minority who hates to be called this, but like I said, I won't prohibit people from calling me it, I appreciate the sentiment! x

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  13. I never really thought that much about the word cute before but after reading this I can totally see why it could be a little annoying to be called cute! I'm also short and have a baby face so also get called cute, although I don't mind it too much! But there are definitely better words than cute to use to describe someone! xx

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    1. Yeah I think that there are better words to use Chloe, but like you said, you don't mind it too much and I'm sure plenty of others don't mind either! xx

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  14. I completely understand this as a 5ft3 smiley woman I do get called cute a lot! But I don’t really mind to be honest. I do understand your points though, it is quite a “bit grown up” word xx

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    1. Yeah I think, for me personally, there are better words/compliments to be called! xx

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  15. I'm 26 this year and a lot of people still call me 'cute' because I'm 5'1 and I look younger than my age and sometimes I don't mind it (when my boyfriend calls me cute I find it endearing) but sometimes I absolutely hate it when it comes from the wrong person.

    🌿 Marissa Belle × marsybun.com 🌿

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    1. I can see why you would find it endearing when your boyfriend calls you cute, that's quite sweet! I agree, I hate it when somebody I don't really like calls me cute, it winds me up!

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  16. You're making quite valid point here actually! Calling someone cute is often done in a downgrading manner and even though it perhaps isn't meant like that, it feels like it, and it's not okay. I've talked about this many men, actually. For many men it's an insult to be called 'cute' because they consider it to mean small and weak. Who'd want to be called small and weak? :D I think you're completely within your rights to tell people that you're not particularly fond of them calling you that. It can be done in a friendly manner and if someone still takes offensively, it's not on you. xx

    Teresa Maria | Outlandish Blog

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    1. Yes lovely, it can be seen to some (like myself) as quite a degrading comment. That's an interesting perspective Teresa, would men be happy to be called cute? I'm sure most won't! xx

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  17. I think you've made some really valid points here! Whether it's meant in a kind way or a derogatory way, it doesn't sit well with you and you're well within your rights to feel like that.

    Also yes, hun is such a horrible word. It feels so passive-aggressive?

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  18. I hate being called cute too! Also, 'baby'. Yuck lol. x

    Zoey | www.zoeyolivia.com

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    1. I'm glad it's not just me who feels this way Zoey! x

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  19. I don't mind being called cute but one thing I HATE being called is hun, I find it so patronizing!

    Rosie

    loverosiee.co.uk

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  20. This is such a great, honest post. I often find been called cute or hun, amongst other words very patronising.

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    1. Thank you Kelly, I'm glad it's not just me who finds these words patronising!

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  21. Awesome honest post lovely. I can understand why some people hate it, and I hate it loads if random people say it to me but I really don't mind it if my husband calls me cute. I'm sending you so much love. ♡

    With love, Alisha Valerie x | www.alishavalerie.com

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    1. I think it's completely different when a loved one calls you cute, it can be seen as sentimental, but I think it's a different kettle of fish when a stranger calls you cute. Thank you so much for reading lovely! x

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  22. Oh my goodness!! I resonate with this post so much - I hate being called cute as I feel like people are looking down on me as less mature and younger, even though I'm 24 xx

    http://www.dellalovesnutella.co.uk/

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    1. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way Della! I hate the word, like you, I feel like people are looking down on me when they call me cute xx

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